I am somewhat hesitant to write this post, since I'm not sure I can put into words what I am feeling and what I believe to be the truth about what happened yesterday at Sandy Hook School in Connecticut. Something is compelling me to do so, however. Perhaps it is my own feeble attempt to grieve and make some sense out of this tragedy. After all the years I spent teaching in public schools, and having a first grade grandson, I can't distance myself from the implications of this horrendous act.
Since I'm in Guatemala, I don't get the instant news bulletins on TV--at least not those from the US. I had opened Facebook yesterday to catch up on what was going on with friends and family, and at the top of the newsfeed was a post by my daughter-in-love. She had posted: "Today was definitely an emotional roller coaster, from one extreme to the next. Started with shock, which was quickly replaced with a tremendous amount sadness and anger. I cannot even imagine how the community of Newtown is coping with such a tragedy; but, I'm praying really hard in hopes that they find some sort of peace...and, I'm hugging my kids a lot today!"
When I read the first two sentences, my heart stopped, thinking something had happened to my immediate family. As I read on, I figured out it was not them, but knew something terrible had happened in a place called Newtown. Going immediately to Google, I was brought to tears reading the news of the school shooting and the unreasonable deaths of so many innocents. Instantly, I found myself praying Ephesians 6:12: For our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the powers of this dark world and against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly realms. (Bold print emphasis mine) Then I sat in horror, unable to even form the words to pray for those involved in the shooting, but I know God heard the cries of my heart anyway.
After a few minutes I began reading the posts on Facebook about this event. They ranged from fear to anger to disgust to sympathy to frustration. What struck me the most, however, was repeated use of the word EVIL, mentioned in the posts of both believers and non-believers alike. In a country that has seemly forgotten the existence of the reality of evil, I was encouraged to see that we have recognized this for exactly what it was--EVIL.
Do I think the shooter was evil? I don't know his heart, so I can't really say. I have no doubt, though, that his actions were encouraged by the evil one, who took the same delight in the killing of these innocents as he did when Herod killed the innocents in an attempt to kill Jesus. Think about that for a minute: the evil one delights in the deaths of children. If nothing else can make us acknowledge our enemy for who he is, surely that does.
Do I believe this man was deranged? Mentally ill? Probably. But that does not mitigate the evil of his actions. Do I think that this might have been prevented if he had receive mental health treatment? Maybe, but many receiving treatment go on to do heinous acts. While I believe strongly in the benefits of counseling and other forms of psychiatric treatment (after all, I worked in mental health for many years), I also recognize that these, while often necessary and helpful, do not go far enough in many cased. Especially in the cases of psychopaths and sociopaths, the evil in their souls cannot be reached by secular treatment alone.
Do I grieve for him? In a strange way, yes, because I am pretty certain he will spend his eternity separated for our God. That's what hell, is, you know. Whether there are flames or not, I do know those who condemn themselves there through their refusal to accept God's love will never have a chance to know His comfort.
Do I believe, as so many have said, that prayer, especially prayer in schools, is the answer? I don't think it would hurt, but am not sure in itself that is the solution either. I know that James says: The prayer of a righteous person is powerful and effective. (James 5:16b) Would all of those who pray be seen as righteous in the eyes of God? Or do some use prayer as a "cold compress" to soothe their hurting hearts, without ever really coming into personal contact with the God to whom they are praying?
I believe, I guess, that the answer to this evil, the answer to all evil, lay in a manger about 2000 years ago. I believe that the solution to the problem of the evil in our world today lies not in laws such as gun control, but in "heart control" found only in relationship with the God who created us, and loved us enough to leave heaven and live and die for us. What are we doing, those of us who claim to bear the name Christian, doing to spread His life and love among those who are the farthest from the heart of the Father--those who we perceive as evil? Isn't this part of going into WHOLE world to make disciples in the name of Jesus?
I confess, too often, I am willing to share His outrageous love only with those I believe deserve it. Who are worth saving. Who are like me. Not with those I deem to be outrageous themselves. . .
Forgive me, Father, for my arrogance in believing that some deserve your love and mercy. Forgive me when I think I merit your salvation. I stand in an ever greater awareness that it is only through your goodness and mercy that I know, love and serve You. Not by any goodness or merit on my part, but because of your great love.
(cf. Eph. 2: 8-9)
For another view of our responsibility to respond in Christ to this situation, I am sharing a Facebook post from Brittney Fulp, a friend and fellow missionary here in Guatemala. I think it's worth the few minutes it will take to read her post.
There's also a great post on what to say in times of tragedy: Dealing with Grief, by Rev. Emily C. Heath.
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Well written and right on the mark, sis!
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