On our way to Dr. Jose's clinic, we stopped and saw Marvin, an eight year old with cerebral palsy, and his family. Through Bethel ministries, Dick has gotten sponsorship for the older brothers to go
to school and we wanted to reward them for their hard work. We stopped to invite them to swim with us tomorrow at our hotel.
We were dismayed and concerned to see how skinny the whole family was. Marvin, Momma and Grandma, especially, were nothing more than skin an bones. It had only been a few weeks since we had last seen them and thought they were all looking better. Mom explained that she had taken Marvin into the clinic in La Gomera where our friend Doctor Jose is practicing, and had been given some medication for fever and parasites. Marvin did not seem to be getting better though. We wondered about recommending the malnutrition project at Hermano Pedro to the family. We made a mental note to talk to Dr. Jose about the family, as we headed to the clinic in Sicapate where he was working today. (Click here to learn more about some of the wonderful things they are doing at this clinic.)
When we talked with Dr. Jose about the family, Dick wondered aloud if maybe they had tuberculosis, which is common in this country. Dr. Jose immediately agreed to accompany us the next day to visit the family when we went to pick up the older boys for swimming.
Saturday morning we picked up Dr. Jose, and headed to the see the family in their village. How many doctors do you know in the US who would take a few hours from their day off to travel to a remote area just to check on a child they had seen only a week earlier, just because we thought it was important? Dr. Jose did not hesitate to offer, and this is one of the reasons we love him so.
Arriving we discovered that Mom still had most of the parasite medication that she had received at the clinic earlier in the week. When questioned more thoroughly, we discovered that she had been giving Marvin only half the prescribed amount. No this was not in a misguided attempt to save money. It was due to her lack of experience and education. In the past she had been given a 10mm syringe to administer medication, so 6mm was about half that syringe. This time, however, she had a 5mm syringe, and was filling this one up halfway, as she had in the past. Only this time, Marvin was receiving only about 2.5 of the 6mm prescribed for him 2 times a day. We cleared up this misunderstanding, I hope. 
Dr. Jose also reminded her that he had recommended that she cutMarvin's nails short. Parasites hide in the area under the nails and
are ingested when children eat with their hands, which is a common
practice here. (This makes so much sense, but again was something
which had never occurred to me! I'm adding nail clippers to the
supplies we carry when we travel. So much easier to use on a child
than scissors, which the family may or may not have.)
I then explained the malnutrition project at Hermano Pedro to Mom, and asked if she thought they would be interested in this treatment to get Marvin stronger and healthier. She promised to talk with her husband about this when he returned home.
After Dick and Dr. Jose talked some more with the family, it was decided that we would get parasite medication for the entire family, and give them a water filter to make sure their water was sanitary and parasite free.
Fernando did an excellent job of explaining the importance of drinking only purified water, and Carlos, the oldest son was listening intently. We asked him if he would be responsible for helping with
the water filtration process and his eyes lit up and he readily agreed. Dick would bring back a filter and demonstrate its use when we returned the children later in the afternoon. Our next stop was at a nearby family. We had been hoping to take these children swimming with us, too, but sadly they were unable to go with us.
The oldest daughter had been having pain in her side and had been in and out of the National Hospital, the family insisting it was an appendix which needed to be removed, and asking for us to pay for treatment in a private hospital.This did not seem to make sense to us, since it doesn't seem likely
that a "hot" appendix would go into remission as many times as her's has. Dad was glad we brought Dr. Jose along, and asked him to look at the records of her hospitalizations. Just as I'd thought, it was not her appendix, but an ovarian cyst. Dr. Jose explained the situation to them, recommending they come to see him at the La Gomera clinic no later than Tuesday morning. He explained to dad that the cyst was at risk of rupturing and would need further treatment, which could be received free of charge in a National Hospital.
The rub, here, is that the mother of the family REALLY does not like Dr. Jose. We are anxious to see if they will follow up with him. In case they don't, I also explained that there are gynecologists
available at Hermano Pedro, as well as surgical teams which can perform this surgery, again at minimal cost. The family only needs to come to Antigua.
This is a difficult case, since in the past much has been done for this family by a variety of mission groups. They have come to somewhat expect special treatment, and I'm not sure they will even
come to Antigua to get treatment for their daughter. They probably would if we came back to get them, and drive them there, but there is no good reason they cannot come up on the bus. This is one of those times when we have to remind ourselves that we only do for others what they are unable to do for themselves. It is hard, though, to walk away when a child is involved who may suffer due to the ignorance or stubbornness of his/her parents. Ultimately, though, these children are the responsibility of the parents, and we are not here to take their places.
We are hoping that with the filtered water, medication, and some nutritional support this family will soon be doing better.
Dad talked with Dick about the possibility of taking Marvin into Hermano Pedro, but Dad explained he couldn't face having him so far away. He is hoping that with the correct dosage of parasite medication, pure water, and properly prepared Encaparina Marvin will do better. He is open to revisit the possibility of in-patient treatment in the future if Marvin does not improve. We explained that we support his decision as a parent, but also asked permission to check back in a few weeks to see how things were going.
So, here we have two more families facing life and death decisions for their children. They are so different. One family seems to be deciding out of stubbornness and a sense of entitlement to "wait us
out" until we provide private treatment for their daughter. While they wait, their daughter's cyst could rupture, risking possible hemorrhage. The second family seems to be deciding out of real love for their child, and the desire to do the best for him--even if we, as outsiders, might think something else is best for him. While both families claim to be Christ-followers, only the second talked of seeking God's guidance and placing their child's life in God's hand. That's probably why it is so much easier to support this family's decision.
Please pray for both of these children, as well as the others we work with who have significant medical needs. Pray for wisdom and humility for their families. And pray for us to trust God's ability to work in and through these situations. Pray we have the humility to trust His heart more than we trust our own "wisdom." And pray that we never hold back what help we have available, but that we use supernatural discernment in knowing if, and when, and how much to help.
(The music in the restaurant where I am writing this is playing "All I need is a miracle, All I need is You." I know it wasn't written to God, but it's a good reminder to me that all I need is God. The rest is His to control and guide, we are just along for the ride.)
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