A Visit to the National Hospital (Oct. 27, part 2)

After leaving the clinic, we headed on to Rony's house to spend some time with Dad and the six other children.  This family is so special to me--I've known them for years, and am especially attached to the girls in this family.  They are really struggling with Rony being so sick and in a hospital far from home.  They seem to understand, though no one spoke it, that there's a good possibility that Rony is dying and they will not see their brother again.

It is a privilege to be invited into these most intimate moments in the life of this family.  It also is somewhat overwhelming.  What do you say to a four year old who wants to know where her brother is, and why her mom is not at home?  What do you say to a fifteen year old who has been one of the primary caretakers for her older brother who is now so ill?  I guess you don't really say anything.  There is nothing to say.  We can just be with them as they walk through this difficult time.  We can just let them know that we care, because God cares.  But sometimes it's hard. . .really hard. . .to stand beside someone you love and know you are totally helpless to take away their pain.  But, just as I know how hard this is, I know that this is what we are called to do, and so we do it.

After visiting with the family, we left for the hospital taking Jessica, the oldest daughter with us. She was going to be a companion for mom and grandma as they took turns sitting with Rony.  What an extreme responsibility for one so young.

We got the the hospital about 2:30.  Unfortunately, the one hour patients are allowed visitors ended at 2.  Both Rony's mom and I asked the receptionist for permission for us  to spend 5 minutes with Rony.  I have to admit that this lady lived up to to every story of indifference and rigidity I had heard about those who work in the National Hospitals in Guatemala.  Mom looked at Dick, and said Rony really wanted to see him, and she thought maybe if Rony could see Dick he would get better.  I thought my heart would break when she said this, and I know Dick's heart did break.  We knew we had to keep trying to get in.

We were fortunate, however, to have a nurse supervising the men's ward who had compassion on this mom whose son was dying and just wanted us to see him.  We also encountered a merciful guard to let us up to see Rony, though we didn't have proper permission.  So we got to spend some time with Rony. . .and this time was so bittersweet.  Rony, who had not opened his eyes in almost 2 days, forced his eyes open when he heard Dick's voice.  Both Dick and I "lost it" when this happened.  I don't know what broke me more, seeing Rony struggle so hard to see this man he loves, or watching Dick once more say good-bye to a child he has known and loved for years.  I knew the grief I was feeling paled in comparison to his anguish.  I thought my heart would break when I heard Dick quietly and confidently tell Rony he would see him again. . .knowing Dick was talking about their reunion one day in heaven.

We tried to hold to our word of five minutes with Rony, but leaving was very hard.  Both Mom and we sobbed as we said good-bye. . .and we thanked her for inviting us into this delicate time in the life of her family. 

I fought tears the entire drive back to Antigua.  I couldn't quite put my finger on what I was feeling--guess I was just overwhelmed at all I had experienced in one day.  And I struggled with feeling guilty, because this really wasn't about me.  I had started out the day asking God to lead my steps where He wanted me to be today. . .and now I was complaining to Him about where He had led me.